The Delight of My Heart

 I was sitting at my kitchen table tonight after dinner, not paying too much attention to my 5-year-old daughter Tessa who was “exercising” a few feet away from me. She loves to watch these kids’ exercise videos on YouTube and will actually do the exercises shown in the videos. But tonight, I had to laugh to myself. When I looked over, Tessa was exercising while holding a dish of chocolate ice cream! Two activities could not be more contradictory than exercising while eating ice cream, but she didn’t care!

Earlier today, I read Psalm 37:4 which says, “Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.” I sat with that verse for a while today, letting the full meaning sink deep into my soul. This verse means nothing about God giving you everything you want, and everything about finding all your joy and meaning and satisfaction and hope in Him. How often have I glazed over this very same verse and thought more about the desires of my heart, as in things and stuff I want or circumstances I want Him to change? But no, those are not the desires this verse is referring to. We can go through the motions of living our lives for God, all while clinging tightly to the desires of our hearts and miss the whole point of faith. Just like Tessa, exercising while eating ice cream, we lose out on the benefits of reading His Word if we don’t live a lifestyle that implements what we are reading about and give up the things that distract us from Him.

My heart, my soul are so sullied and jaded from the daily barrage of all the things I’m supposed to need and want, it is hard for me to take a step back and truly focus on God and the things that will finally fill the void in my heart. God created us and designed us to be in a deeply personal relationship with Him. Seeking Him, leaning on Him, being in constant and regular communication with Him allows us to find our delight in Him. And those desires of our hearts? He in turn gives us unconditional love and forgiveness, peace, strength, comfort, hope, lasting joy. Jesus is all we need. This sounds too easy, but it’s true. We won’t find anything else, anyone else who can fill the void in our lives the way He can. He knows what you need, when you need it. He knows our thoughts and fears before we even express them to Him. He gave everything to show us how much He loves us. Yet we still cling to our stuff!

You may have heard of the fruit of the Spirit. These are the qualities that God pours into our lives, through His Spirit, when we are living our lives in close communion with Him. The list is found in Galations 5:22-23 and I love how it reads in The Message version,

“But what happens when we live God’s way? He brings gifts into our lives, much the same way that fruit appears in an orchard—things like affection for others, exuberance about life, serenity. We develop a willingness to stick with things, a sense of compassion in the heart, and a conviction that a basic holiness permeates things and people. We find ourselves involved in loyal commitments, not needing to force our way in life, able to marshal and direct our energies wisely.”

Dear God, today I want to find my delight in you. Just as a young child might have visible and unrestrained delight at the sight of a new puppy, give me that unbridled joy when I encounter You, when I spend time with You and in Your Word. Give me the desires of my heart. Fill me up with the things I really need, not the fruitless things of this world. In Jesus Name, Amen.

The Gift...

I happened to spend some time last week driving through a city cemetery.  I don't visit cemeteries often but I was trying to teach a friend how to drive and it seemed the perfect place.  As we slowly wound our way around the grounds, I started to read the various headstones, noticing that many were very old.  I remembered reading a few months back how within 75 years of our passing, there most likely won't be a single person left who remembers us.  Wow, I thought, 75 years isn't even that long.  To think that a life can come and go so quickly, only to then be forgotten so quickly is rather shocking and perhaps even disheartening.   How can our lives, that seem to stretch out endlessly before us, suddenly come to an end and be forgotten so quickly?   A verse I memorized a long time ago came to mind...  

1 Peter 2:24-25  “People are like grass; their beauty is like a flower in the field.
The grass withers and the flower fades. But the word of the Lord remains forever.”

On Christmas today, I watched as my kids opened all of their gifts, big smiles on their faces.  New memories were made that I hope they will carry with them into adulthood.  

A large box sat on our toybox for me...a gift the girls had made for me over the past month.  As I eagerly tore into it, a beautiful warm blanket that they had crocheted lay inside.  Any gift is special when you know that the giver had you in mind...but there is definitely something extra special about a handmade item.  There is an extra element of sacrifice, knowing it took a great deal of time to gather all of the supplies and make it.  

As I look back on this past month leading up to Christmas, I think about all the ways God has comforted me, encouraged me, and touched my life, preparing my heart to receive His most precious Gift.  

His Gift is free to everyone, yet cost Him everything.

His Gift is priceless and endures forever

His Gift is His own Son, Jesus.  

When I think of the lengths He went for me, I realize how deeply He loves me and how precious each day is that He gives me.  I take so many things for granted, over and over again.  I take so many of my days for granted, not appreciating all that He has given me.  When I come to the end of it all, I hope I can look back and say that I spent my days meaningfully and lived with a purpose, driven by the Gift God has given me.  I hope I can say that I cherished that Gift, every day.  Every one of us has an opportunity to know God and accept or reject His gift.  I pray that you will take hold of the Gift of Jesus, and in finding Him, you will find a greater joy than you have ever known before.  

Transformation

 A few weeks back, I took the kids to fish in a nearby lake.  We've had a very hot and dry summer here and the water level in the lake was lower than usual.  This must also have encouraged the growth of thousands of water lilies.  They grew so densely along the edges of the lake that the kids couldn't even cast out their lines in many places without snagging on the lily pads.

So instead, they got out their nets and got busy catching tadpoles.  In a matter of minutes they had caught about 20 large tadpoles, probably from large frogs or bullfrogs.  And of course, at the end of our visit to the lake they asked to bring them all home.  We have a lot of critters to care for in our house, 2 dogs, 2 cats, 1 bunny, many fish, and a dozen monarch caterpillars....and now...tadpoles!  But who can resist a good science lesson and a chance to witness one of God's miraculous transformations of tadpole to frog?

As the days passed several of the tadpoles began to grow legs and lose their tails and finally three of them were ready to be released.  As we were caring for these tadpoles, I encouraged my girls to take a tadpole from their fish tank and place it with these newly caught ones.  Now here is the interesting thing - they caught this tadpole last spring - and it never transformed!  I am not sure if I should be reaching out to someone in the scientific community to report this anomaly of nature.  Removed from the hardships of life - temperature variations, weather and predators, this tadpole was content to stay - just a tadpole!

I wonder, friends, if we too are not all too content to insulate ourselves as much as possible from the hard places in life and thereby miss out on opportunities for our lives and hearts to be transformed.  When I am pushed outside of my comfort zone, it is there that I grow.  Maybe God is challenging you right now...but as much as you want to resist change, ask Him to help you and to show you what it is that He might be trying to accomplish in your life.

Dear God, help us today to be open to whatever You might have for us to do and to walk bravely in it.  Transform our lives and our hearts so that we might die to our old selves and be transformed to be more like You.  In Jesus Name, Amen!

Seeking the Son

 How much do you know about sunflowers?  They are really quite fascinating when you take some time to learn about them!  As I sat on my deck early this morning, I noticed how all of my sunflower plants were facing east.  Every day, the sunflower begins by facing east where the sun rises.  As the day progresses, the sunflower turns to face the sun as it travels across the sky, ending in the west at sunset.  Then, overnight, the sunflower turns back east, anticipating the sunrise the next morning.

Another fun fact about sunflowers is that the seeds are arranged in the Fibonacci sequence, to maximize the number of seeds in can pack into the head and optimize the chance of pollination.  The leaves too are arranged in a spiral pattern, maximizing their exposure to the sun.

The sunflower plant knows exactly what it needs to grow, and goes after it in every way it can!  There is no way to distract it from it's sole purpose of absorbing sunlight in the greatest quantity possible!

As I think about my faith in God, I am impressed by the tenacity of the sunflower.  What if I was as focused on seeking after Jesus as the sunflower is in seeking the sun?  What if I woke up every morning, looking for, waiting to experience closeness with Him.  What if my focus on Him did not waver as the day progressed and I kept Him in my sights at all times, as I interacted with others, took care of my children, made decision after decision.  And at the end of the day, when I lay down to rest, I would reset overnight, so that I would be ready to wake up the next day, walking with Him all over again.

The complexity and beauty and mathematical genius of the sunflower is just one of many examples in Creation of a masterful Creator Who cares about what He creates.  And I am told that He cares so much more about you and me...

Before the heat became too oppressive, I spent some time in the backyard, with Tessa helping, planting more sunflowers.  I hope as we watch them grow over the next few months, they can inspire us to seek the Son more passionately, to remember where our strength and hope and sustenance comes from.

Gratitude...

In this season leading up to Easter, I am always so drawn to the newness of life we see in Spring.  It feels so appropriate to look out the window everyday, seeing this transformation after winter, and draw the parallel of the newness of life that Jesus offers me through his death and resurrection.  How incredibly grateful I am!  

A verse that comes to mind often when I'm thinking about gratitude is Philippians 4:11-13

"Actually, I don’t have a sense of needing anything personally. I’ve learned by now to be quite content whatever my circumstances. I’m just as happy with little as with much, with much as with little. I’ve found the recipe for being happy whether full or hungry, hands full or hands empty. Whatever I have, wherever I am, I can make it through anything in the One who makes me who I am."  (The Message)

If you are struggling right now, if life has not been kind to you, cry out to God.  Ask Him to help you in your pain and struggles.  Ask Him to give you the strength you don't possess on your own.  And then thank Him...express gratitude for what He has done for you, even down to the most simple and mundane things...  Being content in our circumstances is a daily practice.  It is never easy.  And while we may obtain mastery one day, the next day (or hour!) we can find ourselves in an entirely different mindset.  

Recently I was with the kids on a rather long hike.  One wrong turn made the it even longer and we found ourselves hiking down a steep hill in some serious mud.  Once we had made it halfway down the hill, we figured we might as well go all the way to the bottom.  But then we had the arduous task ahead of us to climb all the way back to the top.  I had been carrying Tessa in the backpack on the way down and was exhausted.  Then Eva hurt her ankle so Reese took Tessa and I carried Eva.  Working my way back up the hill, I wondered how often God has stepped in to carry me, perhaps when I didn't even realize it?  

Gratitude and contentment go hand in hand.  We express thankfulness even when we don't "feel like it" and it helps us in taking an inventory of all the "good things" to then find contentment.  Sometimes our prayer might be as simple as, 

"God, You are there, You see me me and You care.  That is enough for me today..."

Embracing Seasons...from Thailand Tropics to Pittsburgh Ice and Snow...

 

In search of elephants

I've had 10 days now to reflect on my trip to THailand.  I don't want to let too much time pass and have my memories dim.  In these 10 days my mind and body have gone through such a shock adjusting back 12 hours to Eastern Time, adjusting to the gray days of winter, adjusting to the food as I already long for the delicious fresh fruits we ate every day while away, and adjusting to the frigid temperatures...about a 90 degree difference from one week to the next!

Seasons always cause us to reflect, to pause and appreciate, so I don't want to miss the opportunity to do so.  (Though I could have gone without the extreme cold!)  

Visiting Asia was unlike any experience I've ever had before and exceeded all of my expectation.  Every day we were there I was struck by the warmth and kindness of the people we encountered, so ready to answer any questions we had or help us.  We met a wonderful tour guide on the elephant safari who was willing just to sit with us and enjoy seeing 15 elephants meander across an open plain as the sun cast golden rays.   After the safari we inquired about the rubber trees that we saw growing and got a full demonstration from a man who showed us how they harvest the rubber out of the tree.  We met a helpful guide on our boat ride through a mangrove forest who explained what life was like in a small fishing village we passed by and how the fishermen had to go out for 8-10 days to sea to catch squid that used to be plentiful closer to shore.  We met a salt farmer who graciously explained the process of farming salt and how long it took (about 2 month for the water to evaporate!).  And then we stopped at a small shop along the highway to purchase a little salt.  I got two small bags of two different kinds for just $1.  The woman working there described with enthusiasm the different types of salt they made and sold. On realizing how little it cost as I walked away, I wished I had given her more money.  I can't imagine working each day selling salt.  We met a friendly man at the fishing pond we visited who was the manager and who spent at least 40 minutes baiting the kids' rods and helping them cast out.  I think he was as excited as the kids when we caught a fish!  And I visited Dalis's school and met her dear teachers and was so touched by their warmth and the loving environment they created for the students there.  We ment a woman working in the Bangkok Butterfly House who was collecting leaves with eggs and caterpillars on them. She kindly took the time to explain what she was doing and how they would be taken to a special room to grow and hatch into butterflies.  And we met a friendly tuk-tuk driver who took us on a fun ride and then a little tour of the Chatuchak Market.

The cave and temple

We saw extreme wealth, intermingled with extreme poverty.  They coexist everywhere.  We saw flowers in abundance.  I woke to the sound of bird calls every morning that made me want to join right in singing.  I fell in love with Thaildand and the beautiful people and places and creatures and all aspects of creation that we met and saw while there.

We took a hike to Phraya Nakhon Cave to see the gorgeous temple inside and it was perfectly timed to see the sun start moving across to illumiate the temple, just after we got there.  It was so breathtaking and well worth the strenuous uphill hike that left us drenched and parched.

We visited the incredible ruins of Ayutthaya, which are over 700 years old.  At our last stop there we even rented traditional Thai outfits and as the sun set golden on the temple ruins, it was purely magical.

A salt farm!

Going on this trip, flying to the other side of the world, gave me a perspective I never could have gained any other way.  Havign the opportunity to spend so much time with my precious family members there and see what life is like in Thaildn was priceless. Forme, it provided a window into my brother's world that I never would have had the opportunity to experience any other way.  And it strengthened the bonds I have tiwh my sister-in-law and niece so much.  It gave me a new appreciation for my sister-in-law and for all that she has endured over the past 8.5 years in the absence of my brother.  And in spite of the deep sorrow, a beautiful story is unfloding in the life of my niece...

Salt for sale

Now back at home, I miss Thai foods, Thai weather, the singing birds, the beautiful flowers, and most of all my family.  My fears in taking this trip melted away as soon as we boarded the first aiprline, and I felt a closeness to God more deeply than I have felt in a long time throughout this trip.  I felt His provision, His protection, and His blessings over us again and again.  And while the emotions of being there brought on a new and heightened sense of this closeness, I know that He has been walking alongside me, just as real, just as close, every single day before this and will beyond it too.  

While it may be harder to "appreciate" the beauty in my days, now back at home...the cold winter weather, piles of laundry and dirty dishes...the routine...mundane...there is beauty here too.  God uses our seasons to awaken our hearts to a realityt we so often overlook.  For me, it was an awakening to live a less distracted life going forward, to seek out His will for me with each new day, to be obedient to set my own interests aside and meet the needs of others when I encounter thme.  

God used several scriptures to speak to my heart on this trip.

Romans 12:1-2 (The Message) in particular sticks with me...

So here’s what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.