I turned on the TV a little before noon to watch the weather. The Doctors show was on and they were talking about the importance of relationships to your health. They were emphasizing the importance of making "real" contact with people and not just using Facebook as your primary source of interaction. I was thinking about this after I shut off the TV...wow has it really come to that point? That doctors have to take time to tell us to walk away from the computer screen and schedule an outing with a friend so we can chat face to face...or pick up the phone and actually call someone you haven't spoken to in a while? What does this mean for the future...for our kids' generation and beyond? It makes me so sad to think relationships have come to this. I saw an advertisement the other day for a smart phone with a Facebook button on it that lights up every time you take a picture...so you can share every picture you take on Facebook instantly. I know that is cool and all but I think it's really easy to get caught up in all the technology and fail to really connect meaningfully with anyone. In an attempt to reach out to as many "friends" as possible, we neglect opportunities to connect to the friends who mean the most to us.
I use Facebook and rely heavily on email for communication since my kids always seem to go berserk when I'm on the phone. But I want to make a concerted effort and be more intentional about keeping up with people I care about...I want to set a good example for my kids. Sometimes the best way to brighten someone's day (even your own) isn't done with the click of a button (unless it means turning off the phone or computer) but by walking across the street and knocking on a neighbor's door to say hello.
Showing posts with label Soapbox Friday. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Soapbox Friday. Show all posts
Thursday, September 8, 2011
Thursday, May 5, 2011
Texting while living...
Ok so hopefully I don't make too many enemies by saying what I am about to say...but am I the only person bothered by the amount of texting going on these days? A few months back I was angered when several people in front of me at a movie were texting throughout the entire movie. I have nearly been run over walking down my street on a number of occasions by someone texting while driving. And yesterday's little trip to the Children's Museum only increased my frustrations with texting exponentially. It seemed like at least half of the parents who were there as chaperones for the many school trips were more focused on texting than watching the kids they were in charge of. At least 4 times, older school kids were bullying my own kids and every time I looked around to see where the adult in charge of watching them was.....they were texting. I'm not against texting....don't get me wrong. I have yet to enter the 21st century I guess because I don't text....but it seems that texting has infiltrated so many people's lives to the point that they aren't even really present in their day to day activities any more. If you are going to take your kids to the museum, then go to the museum and focus on that time with them there. I'm pretty sure most of those texts being sent back and forth yesterday weren't that important. Sorry...just had to get that off my chest.
Carter and Reese spent the morning with a neighbor so I could attend my last Bible Study of the year. She broke a nail and Carter told her, "I don't know how you will get a new one because they don't sell those at the grocery store." He also told her "I will show you where the mop is if you make a mess on the floor."
I forgot to mention this before I think but Reese really likes one of the songs from their class and was singing "Jesus is alive!" over and over again on the whole 6 hour trip to NJ last weekend. So cute!
Carter and Reese spent the morning with a neighbor so I could attend my last Bible Study of the year. She broke a nail and Carter told her, "I don't know how you will get a new one because they don't sell those at the grocery store." He also told her "I will show you where the mop is if you make a mess on the floor."
I forgot to mention this before I think but Reese really likes one of the songs from their class and was singing "Jesus is alive!" over and over again on the whole 6 hour trip to NJ last weekend. So cute!
Friday, February 18, 2011
Parenting affirmations
Fridays are great...it's the end if the week (FINALLY!)...it's the knowledge that you'll get a "break" of sorts from the daily grind...or at least more help dealing with the kids....it's a feeling of accomplishment that you survived another week. But Friday's can also be hard sometimes. When you're a stay-at-home mom, you no longer have that satisfaction of a paycheck at the end of the week. You no longer have someone telling you "Nice job!" or a project you can manage to successful completion. You don't get to go our for Happy Hour with friends to finish off the week. No sometimes, you get to the end of the week and think...what did I even do all week, am I doing a good job with my kids, and will they ever appreciate or understand the sacrifices I'm making for them?
By Friday, I am always exhausted from my children mentally, physically and emotionally. They have this uncanny knack of knowing how and when to push my buttons....the same way they have a little homing beacon that directs the to the ONE puddle in my entire yard. Week after week of dealing with these full-frontal assaults can leave a tired parent ready to just throw up their hands in defeat. It is easy to feel unimportant, unsuccessful, and defeated. But sometimes you have to just look a little harder for the rewards of being a parent. It may not be a monetary reward or a verbal praise....it may be more in the form of a sticky kiss, a crooked smile, or an "I love you" at the end of the day. Whether you are a stay at home mom or a working mom, sometimes you just need that little bit of extra affirmation to get you through a rough patch....just knowing, it will be OK...parenting is the hardest job in the world...you are doing great....your kids will turn out OK. So to all you mommies out there...keep on keeping on. Parent today in a way that you won't have any regrets tomorrow.
My little "reward" last night was sitting in the car driving home hearing Carter say this: "When we get home, I want to play football for a little while, then go to bed. NO...I want to play football and have chocolate yogurt, then go to bed. Does that sound like a plan, man?"
If I had my child to raise over again
I'd build self-esteem first and the house later
I'd finger paint more and point the finger less
I would do less correcting and more connecting
I'd take my eyes off my watch and watch with my eyes
I would care to know less and know to care more
I'd take more hikes and fly more kites
I'd stop playing serious and seriously play
I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars
I'd do more hugging and less tugging
I'd see the oak tree in the acorn more often
I would be firm less often and affirm much more
I'd model less about the love of power
And more about the power of love.
Diane Loomans
By Friday, I am always exhausted from my children mentally, physically and emotionally. They have this uncanny knack of knowing how and when to push my buttons....the same way they have a little homing beacon that directs the to the ONE puddle in my entire yard. Week after week of dealing with these full-frontal assaults can leave a tired parent ready to just throw up their hands in defeat. It is easy to feel unimportant, unsuccessful, and defeated. But sometimes you have to just look a little harder for the rewards of being a parent. It may not be a monetary reward or a verbal praise....it may be more in the form of a sticky kiss, a crooked smile, or an "I love you" at the end of the day. Whether you are a stay at home mom or a working mom, sometimes you just need that little bit of extra affirmation to get you through a rough patch....just knowing, it will be OK...parenting is the hardest job in the world...you are doing great....your kids will turn out OK. So to all you mommies out there...keep on keeping on. Parent today in a way that you won't have any regrets tomorrow.
My little "reward" last night was sitting in the car driving home hearing Carter say this: "When we get home, I want to play football for a little while, then go to bed. NO...I want to play football and have chocolate yogurt, then go to bed. Does that sound like a plan, man?"
If I had my child to raise over again
I'd build self-esteem first and the house later
I'd finger paint more and point the finger less
I would do less correcting and more connecting
I'd take my eyes off my watch and watch with my eyes
I would care to know less and know to care more
I'd take more hikes and fly more kites
I'd stop playing serious and seriously play
I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars
I'd do more hugging and less tugging
I'd see the oak tree in the acorn more often
I would be firm less often and affirm much more
I'd model less about the love of power
And more about the power of love.
Diane Loomans
Friday, January 14, 2011
Paraben Paranoia
Some of you reading my blog may feel that at times I am a tad on the uber paranoid side...I know I probably worry way to much about food and health etc. but I have about zero trust in the government or the FDA or even doctors for that matter to provide me with information and protect me from toxic chemicals. I think it's all about the bottom line when it comes to personal health and you really have to be your own advocate these days. Having children is what really started my investigative attitude towards these things...namely my incredibly difficult Cesarean experience with Carter. (but that's a totally different story) And it has been a domino effect of fact-finding, leading to more research, leading to more fact-finding...you get the picture.
So what started with switching to organics, eating more natural, unprocessed foods, buying meat and eggs directly from the farm, baking all my own breads, has now morphed into a whole new way of life. I may seem unnecessarily concerned about these matters and I hope I don't come across as a snob or judgmental if you don't hold the same viewpoints as me. It's just that I feel the need to share what I know, now that I know it. After I did a makeover of the foods we are putting into our bodies, I started to think about the products that go on our bodies: shampoo, soap, cosmetics, sunscreen, lotion, deodorant, and lip balm. And again, the more I investigate, the more sickened I am by what I read and what I find. I am literally slathering toxic chemicals all over my body and my kids bodies every day...and it's all FDA approved! Parabens, in particular, seem to be in everything. A friend tipped me off to this website called Environmental Working Group which is a great resource for finding out how safe the products we are using really are.
I just read a great post on Ohdeedoh yesterday about paraben-free diaper creams. Some of the comments were mentioning that it is not all that hard to make your own homemade version out of olive oil and beeswax. Don't know if I'll go that far but I am intrigued, to say the least. Derrick found me instructions for making home made soap and shampoo, all organic, and printed it all out for me for Christmas. Oh what a husband! Phlalates are another concern, as they mimic the body's hormones and have, in laboratory animal tests, been shown to cause reproductive and neurological damage.
I think the key is just to read labels and question ingredients that are hard to pronounce. You really can't be too careful these days and there are plenty of safe and natural alternatives out there, whether you make it yourself or buy it at the store.
So what started with switching to organics, eating more natural, unprocessed foods, buying meat and eggs directly from the farm, baking all my own breads, has now morphed into a whole new way of life. I may seem unnecessarily concerned about these matters and I hope I don't come across as a snob or judgmental if you don't hold the same viewpoints as me. It's just that I feel the need to share what I know, now that I know it. After I did a makeover of the foods we are putting into our bodies, I started to think about the products that go on our bodies: shampoo, soap, cosmetics, sunscreen, lotion, deodorant, and lip balm. And again, the more I investigate, the more sickened I am by what I read and what I find. I am literally slathering toxic chemicals all over my body and my kids bodies every day...and it's all FDA approved! Parabens, in particular, seem to be in everything. A friend tipped me off to this website called Environmental Working Group which is a great resource for finding out how safe the products we are using really are.
I just read a great post on Ohdeedoh yesterday about paraben-free diaper creams. Some of the comments were mentioning that it is not all that hard to make your own homemade version out of olive oil and beeswax. Don't know if I'll go that far but I am intrigued, to say the least. Derrick found me instructions for making home made soap and shampoo, all organic, and printed it all out for me for Christmas. Oh what a husband! Phlalates are another concern, as they mimic the body's hormones and have, in laboratory animal tests, been shown to cause reproductive and neurological damage.
I think the key is just to read labels and question ingredients that are hard to pronounce. You really can't be too careful these days and there are plenty of safe and natural alternatives out there, whether you make it yourself or buy it at the store.
Friday, December 17, 2010
Appreciating Change
Change has a way of creeping up on you. One minute you're young and carefree...the next you are married, working long hours, raising a family. Kids....oh the changes they bring to your life. It's often hard to appreciate children, when it seems most of the time they are taking so much out of you...your money, your sleep, your sanity! It is hard, amidst the stress, the pressure, and the long nights, not to sometimes wish away your kids childhood. "If they only reach this milestone, it will get easier." "Once he can walk I'll be able to do more with him." "Once she is eating solid food, she'll be happier." I find myself, almost every day, thinking this way at some point, because it is hard being a parent. In the moment, it is hard not to get frustrated, to want a break, to want things to get easier again.
So many people are trying to turn "back the clock." Our culture has such a hard time embracing change and aging and just the stages of life. There are all kinds of gadgets, products and health foods that promise you a "younger looking complexion," "thicker and more shiny hair," "fewer wrinkles," ... We want to stay young but we want our kids to grow up as quickly as possible.
It is ironic that I started writing this post this morning because this has become the kind of day where I feel like my kids have knocked me down, trampled over me, chewed me up and spit me out. It's been a rough one. And this is just the kind of day where I'm starting to think, "oh by next year things will get easier." But I've started to notice a few things lately that make me want to put a halt to this kind of thinking. The kids are growing out of some of their clothes, Carter is graduating to new, longer books, Reese is starting to read more with me, Reese is starting to say a few words. They are growing up, all too fast, and I suddenly realize how fleeting and precious these moments are that we share with them as babies.
I want to do a better job at appreciating the changes in my life. I want to embrace the challenges of parenthood and accept that things are really hard as you go through the different stages, but remember that it doesn't last forever. I want to remember that they are only little for so long and not wish a second of that away.
So many people are trying to turn "back the clock." Our culture has such a hard time embracing change and aging and just the stages of life. There are all kinds of gadgets, products and health foods that promise you a "younger looking complexion," "thicker and more shiny hair," "fewer wrinkles," ... We want to stay young but we want our kids to grow up as quickly as possible.
It is ironic that I started writing this post this morning because this has become the kind of day where I feel like my kids have knocked me down, trampled over me, chewed me up and spit me out. It's been a rough one. And this is just the kind of day where I'm starting to think, "oh by next year things will get easier." But I've started to notice a few things lately that make me want to put a halt to this kind of thinking. The kids are growing out of some of their clothes, Carter is graduating to new, longer books, Reese is starting to read more with me, Reese is starting to say a few words. They are growing up, all too fast, and I suddenly realize how fleeting and precious these moments are that we share with them as babies.
I want to do a better job at appreciating the changes in my life. I want to embrace the challenges of parenthood and accept that things are really hard as you go through the different stages, but remember that it doesn't last forever. I want to remember that they are only little for so long and not wish a second of that away.
Friday, December 3, 2010
It's not about the Presents
My 3-year old reminded me of something very important yesterday. I LOVE to shop and I do mean love. And Christmas always seems to give me an excuse to shop more than usual...that's what it's all about this time of year, right? Obviously, the gift giving frenzy that ensues this time of year is all concocted and promoted by the retail industry. And I don't mind it, to a degree. But every once in a while, I have to stop and remind myself...it's not all about the presents.
Carter and Reese both came home yesterday from their Bible School with a little silver box with a bow on top. Their teachers told me it was a Christmas gift from them to me. As soon as we got home, Carter grabbed his box, and with a big smile, handed it to me and said, "Here Mama, this is for you." As I opened it, his eyes gleamed and he had the biggest smile on his face. Inside was a little homemade ornament, a snowflake with his picture glued onto it. I gave him a big bear hug and told him how much I loved it and he just hugged me back and was so pleased. It touched my heart in a way no store-bought gift could. I want my kids to know that the kind of gifts that matter are gifts from the heart, not gifts that cost a lot of money. That little paper ornament will be something I treasure for years to come and the smile it brought to my son's face, seeing me open it, will stay in my memory forever.
As I watch my children grow and play together, I often realize that the "gifts" they use the most are not things you can buy. They love to explore outside, whether it's going for walks in the summer or playing in the snow during winter. And they cherish the gift of time...my taking the time to give them my full attention, to build "castles" with them out of couch cushions and blankets, to read books together, to make cookies or brownies and let them "help."
Kids learn a lot from us, but let's not overlook the things we can learn from them. Let's not cram their heads with the idea of retail-therapy...the philosophy of "he who has the most toys wins". I am excited for my kids to open their Christmas presents this year, but I am even more excited to spend time with them in the year to come, playing and learning together. And I'm excited to share with them why we celebrate Christmas in the first place, to remember Christ's birth, the ultimate gift from God to us.
Carter and Reese both came home yesterday from their Bible School with a little silver box with a bow on top. Their teachers told me it was a Christmas gift from them to me. As soon as we got home, Carter grabbed his box, and with a big smile, handed it to me and said, "Here Mama, this is for you." As I opened it, his eyes gleamed and he had the biggest smile on his face. Inside was a little homemade ornament, a snowflake with his picture glued onto it. I gave him a big bear hug and told him how much I loved it and he just hugged me back and was so pleased. It touched my heart in a way no store-bought gift could. I want my kids to know that the kind of gifts that matter are gifts from the heart, not gifts that cost a lot of money. That little paper ornament will be something I treasure for years to come and the smile it brought to my son's face, seeing me open it, will stay in my memory forever.
As I watch my children grow and play together, I often realize that the "gifts" they use the most are not things you can buy. They love to explore outside, whether it's going for walks in the summer or playing in the snow during winter. And they cherish the gift of time...my taking the time to give them my full attention, to build "castles" with them out of couch cushions and blankets, to read books together, to make cookies or brownies and let them "help."
Kids learn a lot from us, but let's not overlook the things we can learn from them. Let's not cram their heads with the idea of retail-therapy...the philosophy of "he who has the most toys wins". I am excited for my kids to open their Christmas presents this year, but I am even more excited to spend time with them in the year to come, playing and learning together. And I'm excited to share with them why we celebrate Christmas in the first place, to remember Christ's birth, the ultimate gift from God to us.
Friday, November 19, 2010
To Shop or not to Shop?
People have already started to ask me if I will be doing any Black Friday shopping next week. The answer is a resounding N-O! When I think of Black Friday I start to get goosebumps and the shakes. You probably could not meet a more crowd-averse person than me when it comes to shopping. Ok well there's Derrick....but I'm a close second. ;)
No, not going to be wandering out in the freezing cold, dark, pre-dawn hours to pick up any "amazing deals". Fortunately most of my Christmas shopping is already done. But even if it wasn't, there are two Black Friday events that hold me in check.
Event #1: The Air Compressor
Yes most women probably don't even know what an air compressor is, and I am not going to go into great detail to explain it to you. When you are married to an engineer, you get requests for some pretty unusual gifts. I really didn't even have a grasp of what this gift would involve when I packed out early on Black Friday of 2003 to get to Sears for the big sale. I got there around 5 am and purchased the last air compressor on their shelves...score! A guy wheeled it out to my car and that is when the fun began. He just gave me this quizzical look like, what the $#^*() are you thinking woman? (I have a Civic). This box is bigger than me and weighs at least 60 pounds. I was there by myself and had to go right to work afterward, so I looked at him and mustered as much confidence as I could, saying, "We'll make it fit." We tried the trunk, we tried the backseat, but it just wasn't going in. So I asked him to try the trunk once more...I took about 10 steps backward and ran right for it, slamming my body into it...and it went in!! He was more than a little amused by this exhibition. So the whole day at work I am thinking, ok this thing is wedged in there so tight, it's so heavy...I live on the 3rd floor of an apartment...how the heck am I gonna get it out? And I do not want to be driving around with an air compressor in my trunk for the next month. Yea, I ended up giving Derrick that present early and he had to pry it our himself. Bad planning.
Event #2: The Wedding Band Fiasco
Jump ahead to Black Friday 2007. I have a 2-week old baby now and Derrick sneaks out very early to find some deals. I get up, get dressed and for some unknown reason think to myself...it's been a couple weeks, maybe my wedding ring will fit on my finger now. Well, with some brute force I did get it one but quickly realized it was waaaay too tight and that it was cutting off my circulation. Also my finger was swelling at an alarming rate. The reason I was getting up and getting dressed was because I had to go into the doctor for a check on my C-Section. By the time we got there, I was nearly in tears, it was getting tighter and tighter. Derrick told the receptionist what was going in and I have never been seen by a doctor more quickly than on that day. By the time we were driving back home, it was a dire situation...my finger was turning an unnatural color and we knew we had to do something fast. Derrick said to me, "I think I can cut it off." This brought to mind some pretty unpleasant images of his miter saw and me without a finger... But when we got home, I just wanted that thing off NOW. He found a way to use wire cutters and that was the demise of my lovely wedding band. The people at the jewelery store just loved that when I brought it in to get it "resized!" So I don't know if the moral of this story really has anything to do with Black Friday or just to remember not to force tight fitting rings onto your finger after you've just had a baby. But since it did happen on Black Friday, I tend to attribute it to that day and the bad luck I seem to have when it rolls around.
So no, no shopping for me this year. I'll be staying home with the kids in a nice crowd-free environment, hopefully avoiding any disasters for another year.
No, not going to be wandering out in the freezing cold, dark, pre-dawn hours to pick up any "amazing deals". Fortunately most of my Christmas shopping is already done. But even if it wasn't, there are two Black Friday events that hold me in check.
Event #1: The Air Compressor
Yes most women probably don't even know what an air compressor is, and I am not going to go into great detail to explain it to you. When you are married to an engineer, you get requests for some pretty unusual gifts. I really didn't even have a grasp of what this gift would involve when I packed out early on Black Friday of 2003 to get to Sears for the big sale. I got there around 5 am and purchased the last air compressor on their shelves...score! A guy wheeled it out to my car and that is when the fun began. He just gave me this quizzical look like, what the $#^*() are you thinking woman? (I have a Civic). This box is bigger than me and weighs at least 60 pounds. I was there by myself and had to go right to work afterward, so I looked at him and mustered as much confidence as I could, saying, "We'll make it fit." We tried the trunk, we tried the backseat, but it just wasn't going in. So I asked him to try the trunk once more...I took about 10 steps backward and ran right for it, slamming my body into it...and it went in!! He was more than a little amused by this exhibition. So the whole day at work I am thinking, ok this thing is wedged in there so tight, it's so heavy...I live on the 3rd floor of an apartment...how the heck am I gonna get it out? And I do not want to be driving around with an air compressor in my trunk for the next month. Yea, I ended up giving Derrick that present early and he had to pry it our himself. Bad planning.
Event #2: The Wedding Band Fiasco
Jump ahead to Black Friday 2007. I have a 2-week old baby now and Derrick sneaks out very early to find some deals. I get up, get dressed and for some unknown reason think to myself...it's been a couple weeks, maybe my wedding ring will fit on my finger now. Well, with some brute force I did get it one but quickly realized it was waaaay too tight and that it was cutting off my circulation. Also my finger was swelling at an alarming rate. The reason I was getting up and getting dressed was because I had to go into the doctor for a check on my C-Section. By the time we got there, I was nearly in tears, it was getting tighter and tighter. Derrick told the receptionist what was going in and I have never been seen by a doctor more quickly than on that day. By the time we were driving back home, it was a dire situation...my finger was turning an unnatural color and we knew we had to do something fast. Derrick said to me, "I think I can cut it off." This brought to mind some pretty unpleasant images of his miter saw and me without a finger... But when we got home, I just wanted that thing off NOW. He found a way to use wire cutters and that was the demise of my lovely wedding band. The people at the jewelery store just loved that when I brought it in to get it "resized!" So I don't know if the moral of this story really has anything to do with Black Friday or just to remember not to force tight fitting rings onto your finger after you've just had a baby. But since it did happen on Black Friday, I tend to attribute it to that day and the bad luck I seem to have when it rolls around.
So no, no shopping for me this year. I'll be staying home with the kids in a nice crowd-free environment, hopefully avoiding any disasters for another year.
Friday, November 5, 2010
My Testimony
I've shared a lot about myself as a parent and had tons of posts about my kids, but this Friday I feel led to share with you the most important story in my life, the story of how I accepted Jesus into my heart.
I can still clearly remember the day I asked Jesus to come into my heart. I was 5 years old, it was a sunny afternoon and I was swinging on my swing set and talking with my Aunt Babsy. She told me I needed Jesus in my heart in order to go to Heaven, and I knew it was true. I did not blindly walk into the faith. I was fortunate to be surrounded by parents and grandparents who had taught me about God from a very early age. I learned about Him in Sunday school and by going to Awana and memorizing Bible verses. I learned about Him from hearing Bible stories and by watching the way my family lived their lives, seeking to serve others. And so I accepted God into my heart and the journey began.
I will not pretend that the minute I became a Christian I became some kind of spiritual powerhouse. It was nothing like that. I was still very young and immature and my faith was an immature childish one as I grew and understood more and more. One very catalytic event in my life occurred when I was 12 years old. I was having persistent pain in my knee and saw a specialist in Philly to try and determine what was going on. One x-ray later, a diagnosis of cancer was thrown out at me and this news dramatically changed my outlook on life. It lasted for only a matter of days, but during that time, when we thought I had cancer, I realized all too powerfully how precious life is, and how quickly it could change and even be taken away from you. I realized too that I hadn't been living my life to it's full potential and hadn't been focusing as much on God as I should be. So going forward, I made God more of a priority in my life, spent more time reading His word and in prayer every day. The cancer ended up being a mis-diagnosis, but I believe with all my heart that God allowed those events to play out in my life for a very specific purpose. That He wanted me to have a very vivid picture in my mind of the brevity of life and the urgency in the day-to-day of having that deep and personal relationship with Him. I say urgency, because none of us knows "the hour or the day". I have met so many young, seemingly healthy women, even in just the last year, dealing with unbelievable physical challenges of cancer...it just makes you stop and think and stop to appreciate each day a little more.
The second character-building experience began when I was 20. In a matter of 18 months, I lost two grandparents to cancer and my adopt-a-grandparent I had been visiting for 3 years at college also passed away. I finished my finals a week early and left school early so that I could go home to be with my Grandfather before he passed away. He died on the morning of my 21st birthday and I was there in the room with him and other family members. I will never forget the peace, amidst the sorry, of seeing him pass and knowing where he was going. My grandmother kissed him when the end was very near and said, "Goodnight sweetheart, I'll see you in the morning." I will never forget that moment for as long as I live.
This was one of the most difficult times in my life, where I really questioned God for the first time I think and tried to grasp the reason for these things. Not that I don't understand death...I know we will all die someday. I think it was the close proximity of their deaths and the way it happened...with so much suffering, that made it almost unbearable for me. I struggled to find joy in my life for a long time after that. These were all good people, why did they have to go that way? The difficulty of this experience shaped my character in a way no other events in my life ever have. It was a refining fire in my life...a turning point.
Slowly, ever so slowly I did find healing. I found that joy isn't some particular event, it isn't found in a person, in a job...joy is found in the everyday act of living life. Joy is appreciating every blessing, from the minute my eyes open in the morning until they shut at night....the sunrise, a delicate flower, a child's smile, a warm breeze. We are surrounded by so much beauty that we so often ignore...kind of like God himself. He is always there if we just take the time to look for Him.
I'm still very much a work in progress. My spiritual journey has been challenged 10-fold since having children. The exhaustion and busyness and all the distractions are enough to drive one mad...on a daily basis! But even amidst all of this, I'm trying my best to keep getting to know God better, to keep turning to Him when I have doubts and questions and needs and worries. And whenever I ask Him to speak to me, He always comes through for me, whether it's through a verse, a sunset, a person I meet, something I hear on the radio. His encouragement to me is never-ceasing.
God and religion are not popular words these days. Nobody wants to push their agenda on anyone else or step on anyone's toes. But I would challenge you to think about your life, about your purpose for living. Why are you here? What do you hope to achieve in life? Where is happiness found for you? And what happens when you die? You may think you don't need God to have a happy and fulfilled life, and that may be true. But don't dismiss Him completely...give Him a chance to reveal Himself to you. Seek Truth...and the Truth will set you free.
I can still clearly remember the day I asked Jesus to come into my heart. I was 5 years old, it was a sunny afternoon and I was swinging on my swing set and talking with my Aunt Babsy. She told me I needed Jesus in my heart in order to go to Heaven, and I knew it was true. I did not blindly walk into the faith. I was fortunate to be surrounded by parents and grandparents who had taught me about God from a very early age. I learned about Him in Sunday school and by going to Awana and memorizing Bible verses. I learned about Him from hearing Bible stories and by watching the way my family lived their lives, seeking to serve others. And so I accepted God into my heart and the journey began.
I will not pretend that the minute I became a Christian I became some kind of spiritual powerhouse. It was nothing like that. I was still very young and immature and my faith was an immature childish one as I grew and understood more and more. One very catalytic event in my life occurred when I was 12 years old. I was having persistent pain in my knee and saw a specialist in Philly to try and determine what was going on. One x-ray later, a diagnosis of cancer was thrown out at me and this news dramatically changed my outlook on life. It lasted for only a matter of days, but during that time, when we thought I had cancer, I realized all too powerfully how precious life is, and how quickly it could change and even be taken away from you. I realized too that I hadn't been living my life to it's full potential and hadn't been focusing as much on God as I should be. So going forward, I made God more of a priority in my life, spent more time reading His word and in prayer every day. The cancer ended up being a mis-diagnosis, but I believe with all my heart that God allowed those events to play out in my life for a very specific purpose. That He wanted me to have a very vivid picture in my mind of the brevity of life and the urgency in the day-to-day of having that deep and personal relationship with Him. I say urgency, because none of us knows "the hour or the day". I have met so many young, seemingly healthy women, even in just the last year, dealing with unbelievable physical challenges of cancer...it just makes you stop and think and stop to appreciate each day a little more.
The second character-building experience began when I was 20. In a matter of 18 months, I lost two grandparents to cancer and my adopt-a-grandparent I had been visiting for 3 years at college also passed away. I finished my finals a week early and left school early so that I could go home to be with my Grandfather before he passed away. He died on the morning of my 21st birthday and I was there in the room with him and other family members. I will never forget the peace, amidst the sorry, of seeing him pass and knowing where he was going. My grandmother kissed him when the end was very near and said, "Goodnight sweetheart, I'll see you in the morning." I will never forget that moment for as long as I live.
This was one of the most difficult times in my life, where I really questioned God for the first time I think and tried to grasp the reason for these things. Not that I don't understand death...I know we will all die someday. I think it was the close proximity of their deaths and the way it happened...with so much suffering, that made it almost unbearable for me. I struggled to find joy in my life for a long time after that. These were all good people, why did they have to go that way? The difficulty of this experience shaped my character in a way no other events in my life ever have. It was a refining fire in my life...a turning point.
Slowly, ever so slowly I did find healing. I found that joy isn't some particular event, it isn't found in a person, in a job...joy is found in the everyday act of living life. Joy is appreciating every blessing, from the minute my eyes open in the morning until they shut at night....the sunrise, a delicate flower, a child's smile, a warm breeze. We are surrounded by so much beauty that we so often ignore...kind of like God himself. He is always there if we just take the time to look for Him.
I'm still very much a work in progress. My spiritual journey has been challenged 10-fold since having children. The exhaustion and busyness and all the distractions are enough to drive one mad...on a daily basis! But even amidst all of this, I'm trying my best to keep getting to know God better, to keep turning to Him when I have doubts and questions and needs and worries. And whenever I ask Him to speak to me, He always comes through for me, whether it's through a verse, a sunset, a person I meet, something I hear on the radio. His encouragement to me is never-ceasing.
God and religion are not popular words these days. Nobody wants to push their agenda on anyone else or step on anyone's toes. But I would challenge you to think about your life, about your purpose for living. Why are you here? What do you hope to achieve in life? Where is happiness found for you? And what happens when you die? You may think you don't need God to have a happy and fulfilled life, and that may be true. But don't dismiss Him completely...give Him a chance to reveal Himself to you. Seek Truth...and the Truth will set you free.
Friday, October 29, 2010
What's it mean to be Green?
How Green are you? I mean really, how green are you, have you stopped to think about it lately? I feel like these days, a lot of people think they are being green just by going out and purchasing some cute reusable grocery bags. But come on, really? Do you think that is gonna make a difference in how we are treating our environment? Sorry if you are one of those people...I used to be too, if it makes you feel any better. Then I started to pay attention to the amount of STUFF I throw away every single day. About 2 years ago we started composting ALL of our green matter, all fruit and veggie leftovers and scraps, grass clippings, leaves, dead plants, eggshells, tea bags, coffee grinds. I have a 1.5 gallon jug that sits on my counter and I have to take it out to the garden to empty it every single day! But there's still more to it than that.
All summer long you know I complained about my husband not wanting to use the air conditioning unless it was over 100 degrees. Well there's something to that. I know that is definitely extreme but I've got neighbors who have it running when it is 55 degrees out...how cold do they want their house to be??? Turn off the air, the heat, the lights...especially when you aren't even home.
I would say about 80-90% of my kids toys were purchased at thrift stores, consignment sales and things I found people throwing away in my neighborhood. In the last 6 months, I have trash-picked a full size train table, complete with all the track, a power wheels ($300 in the stores), and a little tikes slide that stands about 4 feet high, perfect for Reese right now. People were throwing these things away, sending them into a landfill when there are plenty of kids, right under their noses even, who could definitely use them. A girl at our play group today was saying she posted an add on Craigslist for her old carpeting (it was only 6 years old and they just wanted a different color) and they were willing to give it away for free. She said the couple that came to pick it up had 30-year old carpeting and was so thrilled to have it. Awesome story of reusing and recycling. It's a lot more than just throwing your cans and bottles in the recycling bin every week!
And if you really want to get into the nitty gritty of being green, lets talk Organics. I know I know I know, I'm constantly harping on food issues. But you need to know the facts. Watch "Food, Inc." Read the "Omnivore's Dilemma." You have to know that all the pesticides they are spraying on our foods are entering our bodies when we eat them but are also leaching into our soil and water... You have to know that North Carolina's ten million hogs produce twice as much feces and urine as the populations of the cities of Los Angeles, New York and Chicago combined. Industrial farms, most with thousands of hogs each, store the waste in open-air pits, called lagoons. They spray the waste, untreated, as manure on adjacent fields. Conventional farming is toxic to you and the environment, corrupt, immoral, and cruel to animals.
So what can you do? Hopefully I've given you at least one idea and not offended you in the process. Try to throw away less and less. Why buy everything new? Why spend your hard-earned dollars on food that isn't even good for you? There are some amazing, hard-working farmers I have met in our area in the last year and I am so impressed by their work ethic, and their commitment to sustainable agriculture, not for the money but just because it's the right thing to do. Think about it...
All summer long you know I complained about my husband not wanting to use the air conditioning unless it was over 100 degrees. Well there's something to that. I know that is definitely extreme but I've got neighbors who have it running when it is 55 degrees out...how cold do they want their house to be??? Turn off the air, the heat, the lights...especially when you aren't even home.
I would say about 80-90% of my kids toys were purchased at thrift stores, consignment sales and things I found people throwing away in my neighborhood. In the last 6 months, I have trash-picked a full size train table, complete with all the track, a power wheels ($300 in the stores), and a little tikes slide that stands about 4 feet high, perfect for Reese right now. People were throwing these things away, sending them into a landfill when there are plenty of kids, right under their noses even, who could definitely use them. A girl at our play group today was saying she posted an add on Craigslist for her old carpeting (it was only 6 years old and they just wanted a different color) and they were willing to give it away for free. She said the couple that came to pick it up had 30-year old carpeting and was so thrilled to have it. Awesome story of reusing and recycling. It's a lot more than just throwing your cans and bottles in the recycling bin every week!
And if you really want to get into the nitty gritty of being green, lets talk Organics. I know I know I know, I'm constantly harping on food issues. But you need to know the facts. Watch "Food, Inc." Read the "Omnivore's Dilemma." You have to know that all the pesticides they are spraying on our foods are entering our bodies when we eat them but are also leaching into our soil and water... You have to know that North Carolina's ten million hogs produce twice as much feces and urine as the populations of the cities of Los Angeles, New York and Chicago combined. Industrial farms, most with thousands of hogs each, store the waste in open-air pits, called lagoons. They spray the waste, untreated, as manure on adjacent fields. Conventional farming is toxic to you and the environment, corrupt, immoral, and cruel to animals.
So what can you do? Hopefully I've given you at least one idea and not offended you in the process. Try to throw away less and less. Why buy everything new? Why spend your hard-earned dollars on food that isn't even good for you? There are some amazing, hard-working farmers I have met in our area in the last year and I am so impressed by their work ethic, and their commitment to sustainable agriculture, not for the money but just because it's the right thing to do. Think about it...
Friday, October 22, 2010
Texting
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Vaccines
Reese had her 15 month check up today. She is still mostly 50th Percentile. She's 22 lb 13oz and 30.5 inches tall. Carter weighed that at 9 months if that puts it in perspective! The doctor is still urging me to continue breastfeeding. She will not be a self-weaner like her brother, I can see that now. We are still spreading out all of her vaccines and I am so glad we have a Pediatrician who's 100% on board with that. He told me today that by spreading them out, I'm actually also reducing the number of total vaccines she needs to get since she's old enough now to completely skip the 4th dosage of several of them. We obviously skipped the flu shot again this year. I am so anti-vaccines and especially this one in particular. After the scare last year with the swine flu (well I was never scared to be honest), I trust the AAP and FDA even less than before. When you start looking into vaccines and how they are researched and tested and then you see the ENORMOUS profit that the pharma companies are making off them, it's hard for me to believe they really have the patient's best interest in mind. I think the human body has an amazing capacity to protect itself and heal itself when fueled with the right foods and taken care of with a little old-fashioned common sense. So there's my soapbox speech for this week, take it or leave it.
Friday, October 15, 2010
The latest
Someone asked me last night if Carter and Reese are getting along any better these days. I would have to say a resounding NO! All this week he has made it his goal to "tackle" her as often as possible. Tackling is like his new favorite past time. He tackles anyone, he is not at all discriminating. I was trying to teach him to play Candy Land yesterday (which is oh such a treat let me tell you) and he only wanted to take the little game pieces and make them tackle each other. AHHH!!! His aggressiveness has spiked up a notch and I am just hoping this will be a phase that passes very very quickly. Just last night, he opened the baby gate at the bottom of the steps, let Reese climb up a step then pushed her down the step onto the floor. Not even gonna pretend I kept a cool head when I saw this unfold.
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On a completely different note, I went with a group of friends to hear Pam Tebow speak last night and it was AWESOME! She told her story of being pregnant with Tim and her decision to put her own life at risk and have her baby, despite doctors urging her to have an abortion. Then the Women's Center who sponsored the even showed a short video with interviews of the girls that they have helped, who all decided to have their babies instead of choosing abortion. What amazing and beautiful stories! One of the girls was also in person at the event and brought her little boy Landon with her. Every single day in Allegheny County alone, 22 precious babies are aborted. I cringe to think of this. Pam told a story of her husband while they were in the Philippines, seeing a man about to throw a baby into the river. He stopped the man and asked him what he was doing and he told him that the mother had died in childbirth and the father didn't want the baby so they were just throwing it away. This spurred the Tebow family to start an orphanage in the Philippines for these unwanted children to give them a chance. So hard to imagine a culture that values human life so little it would come to something like that. It is so awesome to hear about people who are trying to make a difference though, trying to provide the support and love that women need to carry these children and give them the choice of life.
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On a completely different note, I went with a group of friends to hear Pam Tebow speak last night and it was AWESOME! She told her story of being pregnant with Tim and her decision to put her own life at risk and have her baby, despite doctors urging her to have an abortion. Then the Women's Center who sponsored the even showed a short video with interviews of the girls that they have helped, who all decided to have their babies instead of choosing abortion. What amazing and beautiful stories! One of the girls was also in person at the event and brought her little boy Landon with her. Every single day in Allegheny County alone, 22 precious babies are aborted. I cringe to think of this. Pam told a story of her husband while they were in the Philippines, seeing a man about to throw a baby into the river. He stopped the man and asked him what he was doing and he told him that the mother had died in childbirth and the father didn't want the baby so they were just throwing it away. This spurred the Tebow family to start an orphanage in the Philippines for these unwanted children to give them a chance. So hard to imagine a culture that values human life so little it would come to something like that. It is so awesome to hear about people who are trying to make a difference though, trying to provide the support and love that women need to carry these children and give them the choice of life.
Friday, October 1, 2010
If I ever have a life again...
If I ever have a life again, I think I will become a Nutritionist or a Personal Trainer. My dream job of becoming a racquetball instructor is probably never going to happen due to the issues I have been having with my foot for the last 5 months. The reason I express my sometimes borderline-extremist views on food and exercise is in direct correlation with my frustrations about the lack of knowledge the vast majority of Americans have about how to stay healthy. I was one of these people just a few short years ago and with each passing day I learn more and more about how the FDA has pulled the wool over our eyes and tricked us into thinking we are living and eating healthfully. People may think I am crazy, dabbling in Veganism (I do say dabbling because I have not made a complete switch yet) and giving up all desserts. But what I would challenge you with on this Friday morning is this: Your body is your greatest asset, right? Everything we put on or in our bodies can potentially impact our quality of life. And the way we spend our time...the level of activity we engage in...that will determine how long we are able to stay strong and healthy into our 70's, 80's and hopefully 90's. I hope that someday I can look back and say, "I did everything I could to stay healthy and keep my family healthy!"
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