Towers that fall...

Evangeline threw a fit the other morning when I caught her trying to dig some lollipops out of the pantry at breakfast time.  In her non-verbal blabber, I could very clearly understand that the reason for her great dismay was my inability to comprehend how such a delicious treat could not be suitable for her first meal of the day.

Sienna grew more and more frustrated one night last week as she was building block towers for the younger kids to demolish.  She wanted them to knock them down, but just not before she had completed the tower.  Inevitably though, in his excitement, Lawson always knocked the tower town after only  a few blocks had been stacked, and Sienna was very upset by this repeated misdemeanor.

We crave things to be a certain way but often that isn't the way they go.  Sometimes what we want isn't the best thing for us, or is even harmful.  Towers fall, expectations aren't met...and we are left with a choice to make at the end of each day....

I'm finding that life isn't meant to be lived according to my standards or agenda...but does that cause me to doubt?  It pushes me to think in a new direction, pushes me to consider that my understanding is so meager compared with that of an omnipotent God.

Rather than growing bitter and disillusioned by life and its twists and turns, I turn to my loving God and surrender my emotions to Him.  Rather than questioning the things I don't understand and allowing them to steal my joy, I rejoice in all the blessings I still have.

I've worked so hard to construct what I think is a good and stable life only to have it knocked out from under me...again...and again...and again.  And only by the grace of God am I able to take a step back, from the disappointment, the pain, and the sorrow, take a deep breath, and start building again.

This is not some mindless game God is playing with me.  This is the way life is meant to be lived.  We aren't promised perfection here on earth, but we are promised to be loved unconditionally.  My towers may fall but thankfully, my foundation is secure.

In His kindness God called you to share in His eternal glory by means of Christ Jesus.  So after you have suffered a little while, He will restore, support, and strengthen you, and He will place you on a firm foundation.

1 Peter 5:10 (NLT)

And the Greatest of these is Love...

I remember a time, only a few years ago.  I was driving my brother back to the airport at the end of his visit to Pittsburgh.  We talked of work and life and plans for the remainder of the year on the 20 minute drive.  It was a rare time for us to be alone together.  I remember wishing him well as he began a new life overseas...a life he had been dreaming of for years.  His excitement was palpable. 

Since Ed passed away, I've often thought back on that time we shared together in the car.  I've often wished I had said so many more things to him that day.  I remembered that drive to the airport as I was driving there this morning, with my sister-in-law Waenyod and my beautiful niece Dalis.  It was a poignant moment as I got closer and closer to the airport, to a goodbye I was dreading, to a flight that would take them home - back to the other side of the world.  It was difficult for me to let go of them, to watch them walk away.  They brought to me such a sense of joy and family that I have so missed these past 2 1/2 years.  They rekindled a sense of hope and togetherness and an appreciation for so many ways God has truly blessed me.






This week my amazing sister-in-law visited with us in Pittsburgh.  She brought my niece all the way from Thailand to meet us for the first time and I could never express to her my utmost gratitude and thankfulness for making such an extreme sacrifice to do so.  It was a purely magical experience...to finally meet this little "miracle" child.  From the minute she walked in the door there was an irrepressible happiness welling up in my heart.  She was enchanting in every way.  Seeing her first encounter with snow, sharing in her 2nd birthday celebration, and just living life with her for a week was so joyful.  I could see my brother in her, through her sense of independence and adventure and love of activity.  She took to the snow like a seasoned pro, and was often the last man standing when everyone else had tired and wanted to come back inside.  One of the English words she had picked up by the end of this week was "again" from the many times she wanted to sled down our hill in the backyard, over and over again.

I truly got to know my sister-in-law this week...know her in a way more personal than I ever have before.  I was so blessed as I watched her interacting with her daughter and with my own children.  I was inspired to be in the presence of this woman who is so resilient and strong and loving. 

The week is now over, all too soon.  We have so many memories that will not soon fade, so many things we were able to do together in this span of 8 days.  The future and when we will meet again is uncertain, but certainly we will.  God has opened my eyes to a world so much larger than what I ever imagined it could be through all of this.  I never would have envisioned that things would be this way, never would have expected my family to look like this...but He has a way of stretching us so far beyond what we would ever choose. 

In my few minutes of quiet, driving home alone from the airport this morning, I tearfully reflected back on my life.  The one thing that stuck in my mind the most was the reminder that so many "things" of this world are fleeting and unimportant...but the greatest gift any of us can give or receive is love.   I reflected on the verses in 1 Corinthians 13...the love chapter...

Love is patient and kind. 

Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. 

It does not demand its own way. 

It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. 

It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. 

Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

When I was a child, I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child. But when I grew up, I put away childish things. Now we see things imperfectly, like puzzling reflections in a mirror, but then we will see everything with perfect clarity. 

All that I know now is partial and incomplete, but then I will know everything completely, just as God now knows me completely.

Three things will last forever—faith, hope, and love—and the greatest of these is love.

 

Family fun...

We are so blessed this week to have the amazing opportunity of meeting and getting to know our beautiful Dalis.  She has taken to the Pittsburgh winter weather like a champ and loves playing in the snow with all of her cousins.  Her sweet demeanor and attentiveness to her cousins are so precious to watch.  Every time I look at her I am just struck by what an amazing miracle she is and what a blessing she is and will continue to be for our family. I am so blessed to have such an amazing sister-in-law who brought her around the world to meet us!!! Can't wait to see what adventures the rest of the week will bring!

Cleaning in the dark...

 We were in the middle of a much-needed basement clean-up last night.  The final task that remained after all the toys were sorted and put away was to vacuum the rug.  Lawson ran to the storage room to grab our old spare vacuum and dragged it out.  He unwound the cord, plugged it in, and started to push it across the room.  All of a sudden, he screamed in excitement, "It has a light!"  And then, the vacuum thudded to the floor, still running, and he disappeared up the steps.

I wondered what he was up to, when suddenly all the lights went off.  Slowly, he made his way back down the dark staircase, peeking at the humming vacuum with light shining.  The light was barely enough to illuminate the large basement, so I turned one small light on.  He insisted on pushing the vacuum around without any other lights.  I tried to tell him he couldn't see the dirt, couldn't see well enough to clean it well.  But he refused to accept the help of any other light.

I thought back on this episode today with a smile on my face. Lawson was so eager to help me - he helps whenever he gets a chance.  Today he wanted to help with the rolling of pizza dough for pepperoni bread, which went about as well as vacuuming in the dark!  When he was finally done "cleaning" last night, I flipped all the lights back on to reveal the many spots on the rug that he had missed.

As I reflected still further on all of this, it struck me how I'm told in Proverbs not to lean on my own understanding.  My understanding, of life, of God's plan for me, of how I'm to live, is so limited.  It's not much better than a weak light on a vacuum cleaner - by no means capable of helping me successfully navigate through stormy waters.  God is right there - like flipping the light switch, He illuminates our world with His presence and His love.  He provides guidance and purpose.

The desire to go through life by means of our own weak understanding soon wanes.  We sense there is something more, much greater, something missing.  Might you and I not mistake what is seen by means of our own understanding as the whole picture.  Might we seek out a wisdom so much higher than our own.

Trust God from the bottom of your heart;
    don’t try to figure out everything on your own.
Listen for God’s voice in everything you do, everywhere you go; he’s the one who will keep you on track.  Proverbs 3:5 (MSG)





And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. (Ephesians 3:17-19 NIV)

Snowballs

 There is something so magical about one of the first snowfalls.  Today the temperatures finally warmed up enough to give us some snow that would form snowballs and the kids really took advantage of it!  They spent several hours rolling balls all over the yard.

 It's pretty amazing that something as tiny and delicate as a snowflake can become something as large and heavy as a giant snowball.  Starting off a new year, this is a great reminder of the way "small things" can have a great impact.  Whether it's a word of kindness, praying with someone who is hurting, sacrificing personal time for someone else's benefit...we can all do small things that may just make a giant impact on the world around us.

As the light faded tonight, the kids went outside once more with Derrick to make another giant snowman...keeping with tradition.  Millions of those tiny flakes, all pressed together, made quite the impressive structure!

The snow will soon be gone but I hope to keep these thoughts in mind...

Hebrews 13:1-2, 16 (NIV) "Keep on loving one another as brothers and sisters. Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it...And do not forget to do good and to share with others..."

One thoughtful act, good deed, and prayer at a time...let's start 2018 off right...

Hot cocoa and cool matching hair styles