The Longest 2 Minutes

 You can try to hold on to the ones you love SO tightly, but in a second they can slip right through your fingers...

I've discovered this truth too many times already in my life...and yet, I still manage to slip into complacency.  I forget how much I have to be thankful for, and to take the time each day to meditate on that, to be grateful, and to express my gratitude to God.  Oh how easily I can jump from one grievance to the next in a period of 24 hours, overlooking countless opportunities to show my appreciation for all of the good.  And the good so overwhelmingly outweighs the bad.

This past Sunday night, I was getting the kids ready for bed.  Sweet Tessa was very tired.  She'd had a fever on and off all day but that hadn't stopped her from playing outside all night with the older kids.  I was walking her down the hall to go up to bed when she started shaking violently in my arms.  I could feel her going limp then, her head tipped back and her eyes rolled back in her head.  Her lips went blue and we could not tell if she was breathing any longer....and all I could think was...I'm going to lose her!  We called 911 and for a few minutes we tried to see if something was in her throat, blocking her airway, tried to get her to revive.  It was horrible...terrifying...humbling beyond words.  We felt absolutely helpless.  The other kids were in shock and crying.  A police officer arrived just as she started to sputter and revive a little.  He told us she had most likely had a febrile seizure and that she was going to be OK.  We spent a tense 6 hours being taken by ambulance to Children's Hospital and waiting for her fever to come down and for tests to be run.  We came home around 3 am and the whole way home I just kept looking back at her, asleep in her car seat, so peaceful.  All the time I was sitting with her at Children's, I heard the sound of other kids crying from time to time, and I wondered how many of them would be able to go home that night.  I replayed what had happened over and over again in my mind...thinking...

Tessa is fine now...completely back to normal and aside from the bruise on her arm from her IV, there is no sign of the trauma she went through just a few days ago.  But what happened, those tense moments of terror and uncertainty, are etched in my mind forever.  Why did God allow this to happen to her? I will never know, but I do trust that God was holding her in His hands the entire time. I can't help but praise Him for the reminder that I am not in control, and that each day we wake up, alive and well, is reason to be so thankful.  

In the days that have followed this ordeal, I have thought a lot more and about how I can keep my focus on what is really important.  In the moments of Tessa's seizure, nothing that had been weighing on us from our to-do list mattered...nothing mattered but seeing her revive.  Maybe, by sharing this, I can help someone else to do the same...to step back from the busy schedule, the to-do list, the projects you want to accomplish at work or around the home....step back and take a few minutes to reflect on your blessings.  And in recognizing those blessings, may we all look for ways to reach out to others who are hurting or struggling and offer encouragement, love, friendship and help to them.  

God, help me never to take for granted a single day that you have given me here on this earth.  I thank you for the GIFT of life...so precious and fragile.  Help me to use my life to serve You and others.   

The Dawn Chorus

But I will sing of your strength, I will sing aloud of your steadfast love in the morning. For You have been to me a fortress and a refuge in the day of my distress. 

 Psalm 59:16 (ESV) 

 There is so much beauty in the morning. I love waking up early in the summer months and going outside as the sun is just coming up. It is always such a peaceful time, never rushed like so much of the day seems to be, but serene and filled with so much hope... 

 The other day I read about "the dawn chorus" which is the time of day, in the morning, from March through July, that birds will sing. Typically, it is the male birds singing to attract a mate. Their songs carry up to 20 times further in the early morning than during the rest of the day when there is so much more competing background noise. The dim early morning light is not as good for foraging for fruit and seeds and insects and singing is more likely to attract a predator in the bright light of day, so this is the perfect time to sing. 

 How I long to model my life after this pattern...to wake up, when it is quiet, when the attacks of the day are less imminent, when there is a hush about the world that just beckons me to come before God. How I long to sing out in praise to Him, to meditate, uninterrupted, on all His goodness, His mercy, His wonderful love for me. There is such wisdom that we can find in nature, if we only take the time to look...and to listen.  

 The troubles of the world seem to melt away when we take the time to enjoy creation, in all of its glorious splendor.  Take the time to sit and listen to the birds singing...notice how different each distinct song is...its beauty and uniqueness.  Take the time to look at a single flower, to really look up close (just watch out for bees!).  The order, the symmetry, the perfection of even a single flower beckons us to question, if He cares so much for even the flowers, how much more does He care about me??

Matthew 6:26-34

Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? 27 And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? 28 And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, 29 yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. 30 But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? 31 Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. 33 But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.  34 “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.

Thank you, God for the dawn chorus, which reminds me to seek out that quiet time to sing out my praises to You.  Thank You for the quiet, still morning hours, so unhindered by all the worries of the world.  Thank You for my daily lesson in how to live, delivered by the birds and the bees and the flowers.  Thank You for caring so much about me, even when so much of the busyness of the day diverts my attention from You.  

Gazing on Splendor...

We use the word awesome a lot.  I'm sure I use it at least 20 times a day, every day.  But when was the last time you were truly in AWE of something.  When was the last time you literally stopped in your tracks, stopped everything you were doing, to pay full attention to something, appreciating it's unique wonder or beauty or the inspiration it provided?  Dictonary.com defines awesome as this:  extremely impressive or daunting; inspiring great admiration, apprehension, or fear.  

I thought about this a lot over the past couple weeks when our family had the opportunity to see two different fireworks displays.  The second that first firework goes up, everyone stops what they are doing just to watch, to be silent, to be awed.

In John 8:12, Jesus says, "I am the Light of the world..."  I think about how much darkness is  in this world, how easily we can go down a path of thinking there is no goodness, no meaning, no hope.  Jesus smashes through that darkness and hopeless to give us LIGHT...amazing, awesome light.

Tessa really hates fireworks

 Lamentations 3:22-24 says,

"Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.”

Every morning, His love waits for us...His amazing, perfect, awesome love.

I've been blessed enough to be able to travel out west multiple times and see some of the incredible landscape that is part of our National Parks.  Standing at the rim of the Grand Canyon, you can't help but feel very small and weak.  You can't even grasp it's depth or width....it makes your knees shake (or at least mine!) and your heart beat a little faster.  This is what I think of when I think of the word awesome.  But we are so quick to overlook the splendor in our own backyards, every single day. We are so quick to affix our gaze elsewhere, to forget about God.

God please help us to see You, in all of your awesome power and spectacular glory, each and every day.  Help us not to take You for granted or think that we can have a relationship with you, at arm's length or on our own terms.  Help us to gaze on Your splendor and to never lose our sense of wonder, of appreciation for all that You have done for us, of Your innate goodness and mercy to keep forgiving us over and over and over again, if we only ask.  You gave everything for us, undeserving, self-centered, backsliding humans who think we have it all figured out.  Break through our thoughts, our aspirations, our agendas to show us Your light, Your truth, and Your plan for us.  In Jesus Name, Amen.